or CHAPTER XI from Marti Soosaar’s e-book *A New Beginning*
Tell me who your friends are and what you eat, and I’ll tell you who you are
If we’re going to take this literally, then right now I’m coffee with milk and Kalev’s dark hazelnut chocolate. Unfortunately—or fortunately—this wasn’t a paid advertisement. Unfortunately, because I don’t get paid for it. Fortunately, because I get to eat whatever I want while I’m writing.
Of course, there’s some truth to the idea that, to a certain extent, we are what we eat—even though we know our bodies process nutrients differently. So, I can stuff my face with kilos of sweets, but in the end, I’m still not as sweet as chocolate—just a regular fat, chubby person.
Our circle of friends influences our eating habits even more, because they’re actually the ones who shape what we eat. We’re all subject to certain social norms, and these norms are shaped by our experiences and the people around us.
In 2003, I started working in Tallinn at the Estonian Sports Association Kalev, and although it’s technically a sports organization, my good colleague Raimo—with whom I usually had lunch— had developed a habit of eating lunch at Hesburger or McDonald’s, and he quickly got me into the habit as well. Two stops by tram from Kosmos to Viru Square, and another big burger meal with large fries and a Coca-Cola—five times a week. During the two years I worked at Kalev, I discovered that the once-muscular decathlete had turned into an average office worker with a potbelly. Of course, those countless burgers didn’t do Raimo any harm, and he’s probably still sticking to his daily fast-food diet. I, unfortunately, couldn’t keep it up—and I’m not the only one.
If your friends like to get completely wasted at the Nimeta bar every Friday and Saturday—to the point where they can’t even remember their own names—and then shovel a wheelbarrow-full of tacos into their mouths on Suur-Karja Street, then you probably don’t have much hope of becoming as athletic and lean as Kregor Zirk if you’re constantly hanging out with that crowd. Maybe you’ll just stay afloat a little better.
If the situation described even vaguely resembles your life, then you now have two options. Either you stop spending time with this kind of crowd and find new friends, or you manage to get your friends to behave differently. The second option might prove difficult, and it’s possible that if you start lecturing them about healthy exercise and nutrition, they’ll lump you in with the Jehovah’s Witnesses. Of course, it’s possible that your friends, too, have realized that their health isn’t as robust as it was at the turn of the millennium, and the time is ripe for a lifestyle change. In that case, give them a chance. Otherwise, switch up the group of people you hang out with on a daily basis for a more athletic one.
Where can you find such people? The workout groups mentioned in an earlier chapter are a good place to start for finding new friends who enjoy sports.
I always tell myself that I want to be more athletic and in better shape than the average Estonian, for whom every other day is a day off. And as a coach, I want to—and must—be a role model for those who have a harder time making it to the gym than I do. That’s why I don’t allow myself much time to make excuses—I find at least 30 minutes to get a more intense workout in. That way, I can get my workout done in any situation, knowing that there’s really no reason to take a day off.
Krete Junson
, youth coach, personal trainer
But how can you get your existing friends to care more about their health? A great initiative for men is Long-Term Friendship Day. Go look it up on Facebook.
Go with your friends for a medical checkup to identify your health risks and get good advice on how to improve your health, and then go hiking together, go karting, play paintball, or do something else fun, which you may have last done about ten years ago. Hopefully, a day like this will significantly raise your friends’ health awareness, and in the end, you’ll benefit from it too, as you’ll bring back into your lives the hobbies you used to enjoy as young people—the ones that were slowly being replaced by sitting in a bar sipping beer.
When you’re surrounded by people with good habits, it’s easier for you, too. To surround yourself with more like-minded people, you have one more particularly simple and wonderful opportunity.
Share this e-book with your friends. Post the link on Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn. If they read it and, as a result, change their habits for the better, positive changes will take place around you, and these will influence you as well.
If you want to be stronger and healthier, change your friends’ habits—or change your circle of friends.
This was the eleventh chapter of Mart Soosaar’s e-book “A New Beginning.” We’ve also published the previous chapters; you can read them on our blog, and you can download the entire e-book HERE.
Invite a friend over to your place or out to the yard to work out with them, and choose a workout HERE.
